For some years as a young child I anxiously contemplated the fact of my own consciousness; how could there be a me that could be aware and alive? Perhaps these were the earliest seeds of my spiritual journey, certainly the questions point at the nature of existing and being, at the phenomenological roots of reality. I thought it astounding that I was here. I used to play the ancestor game, counting back generations until I realized it was futile and infinite. Then I would take it in the macro direction, out to the stars, and travel into the infinite and endless beyond.
This morning while stroking my youngest son's hair and inwardly delighting in his existence, I became aware again of this earliest of questions, for I was appreciating with great gratitude the miracle of his life, and in this moment, perhaps the young child within myself realized that there is no explanation, answer, or solution to the question of existing. Of course there is some deep realization or awakening to the Reality of existence, but even in enlightenment there is no explanation. Indeed it is a miracle, which is the essence of spirituality. You and I and all our animal, rock, and tree friends are simply miracles to be wondered about and appreciated, accepted and loved.
Zen practice is an invitation to dwell within the miracle, to settle into the here and now of being, to open our eyes to wonder, to let our hearts overflow with the joy of aliveness, knowing all the while that it will all pass. Learning to settle means stopping the noise of mind and emotion, the inner pressures to perform, create, and fix, the societal conditioning to digitize and compartmentalize and quantify. It means returning to the simplicity of now, the unadorned and always available moment of peace and gratitude. We are here all together. It is enough.
The grass is green
The ocean blue
Om Svaha!
The Miracle
