Maylie's Oatmeal

I had the good fortune to count myself among Maylie Scott’s friends. Her untimely death still saddens me, yet she lives close to my heart.

I recall an evening at Berkeley Zen Center when Maylie bounced in with her joi de vivre and took out a pot and starting cooking oatmeal for dinner. A few minutes later she suddenly came over to me and asked me in the sincerest way if I wanted dinner. I think I blanched inside and said ‘no thank you’. Oatmeal for dinner, yuck!

Her simple offering brought up my conditioned expectations about dinner and food, the first one being ‘who eats oatmeal for dinner!’. Maylie’s bowl of oatmeal was Zen teaching at its best: unselfconscious and spontaneous. Maylie was making a genuine offering of sustenance, the plain fare of reality. She was hungry, so she ate. She could have cared less whether it was steak and potatoes, vegetables and rice, or oatmeal. She ate gratefully. In a society where simple and natural living have taken a back seat to driving with cell phones and fast food take out, Maylie's bowl of oatmeal sticks deep in my heart.

Ode to Oatmeal

Praise oatmeal!
Oh hearty fiber of earth
Sun and soil and rain blessing
Generously nourishing all

Thank you Maylie for your kind offer.

Nothing to Wait For

After dropping my kids at school the other day, I came home to make soup. I put the pot under the faucet and turned on the water. I became aware of a small disturbance within, and I recognized my own impatience. Taking a breath, I settled into just filling the pot and enjoying the swirl of water and vegetables, the sound of the faucet, and the reflections of light.

It is easy to get caught out between what is actually happening and wanting to push it along. The habit to be where we are not is a kind of mini death. We miss our life as it unfolds. Our life can be boiled down to a single moment of alert activity.

Filling a pot with water can be a moment of wonder. If I want to just get it done so I can move on to other more seemingly important matters, then cooking becomes drudge. As I awoke to my pot-chicken-soup self I became intimate with the chicken, for which I felt gratitude. This was followed by a deep empathetic caring for all who go hungry. The pot was filled with inter-connection and compassion for all of humanity, not just with chicken and rice! There is nothing to wait for in this life...sitting at the bus stop just doing what you are doing is wonderful.....and the bus might come along.

About Sitting Alone

Sitting alone can run the gamut from joyful and easy to difficult and problematic. This is true whether you are new to Zen meditation or an old student. It can be hard to sit daily, it requires discipline, commitment, and faith. If you don't have a teacher, Zen friends, or a community, the absence of feedback and guidance can be difficult.

Here are a few ideas that may be helpful to beginners. Find a time to meditate that works for you and stick to it. Set up a ritual space with a meditation cushion and a few things that you can associate with your meditation, from candles and incense to other sacred objects. They can be things you store in a closet and pull out when you meditate, or you can keep them out. The idea is that you establish constancy, consistency, and a sense of joyful stability.

Don't be a meditation warrior, Zen meditation is about gentleness, peace, learning, and awareness. It is better to meditate daily for ten minutes than infrequently, or to rebound between long periods of discipline and then nothing. Balance and steady effort are important. Set a time that works for you and stick to it for awhile.

Let go of perfectionism and goals. Zen meditation is a goalless exploration of the moment. Just stay curious about your experience. Keep your focus on your breathing, letting your mind focus and harmonize with your breath. It is a bit like a purring cat, or watching ocean waves come in and go out. Don't control your breathing, allow it to be natural. If your mind wanders, return to your breath.

As for posture, stay balanced. Sitting on a pillow can raise you up and help straighten your back. You can use a chair or meditation bench or kneel. If you are injured sit in a supportive armchair or lie on your back. Do what you must to learn about focus and stillness and becoming intimate with the world as it presents itself.

That's it. Keep it simple, steady, and joyful. You can read about Zen posture and attitude in this blog or using other resources. If you need help...please feel free to contact me by email.

Non-Dualism

Non-Dual means there isn't a gap between subject and object, that what we perceive as a gap between things is an artificial creation and a conditioned perception. With meditation practice that separation disappears and we can see that it wasn't there in the first place. Buddhist say that the subject, object and act of perception are joined: the eye, seeing, and the seen are one. At the center of Zen experience is non-dualism.

These days many teachers and practices talk about it in a way that departs from the Zen understanding. Sometimes it becomes a commodity. When non-dualism becomes a goal to achieve or an idealized state or something special, then this isn't true to the heart of Zen. Also, when we are attached to non-dualism we are also far from our true nature. The awakening of non-dualism in Zen isn't separate from the activity of refinement, or working with the difficult problems of our lives.

Non dualism doesn't mean completely non-dual nor totally unified or merged. These can be likely misconceptions. It means the merging of difference and unity, that both uniqueness and the whole of things are interacting. This is the paradox of reality, the not-two not-one essence of Zen. Many Zen parables, teachings, and questions help students ponder the mystery of non-duality and how it arises from shunyata, the emptiness of reality.

Zen is a tradition of realization in action, of wisdom meeting the moment. Just having an intellectual understanding or even awakened insight would be like Mark Twain keeping a frog in his pocket without letting it hop about. Zen practices can help us discover how to live non-dualistically in our work, home, relationships, and stewardship of the earth.

Zazen: Body Posture

The basics of Zen meditation are straightforward. Create a stable and balanced posture that allows your back to be straight, your breathing open, and your mind focused. The details of the posture are reference points for experience. When you get lost in fantasy or memory, emotional or physical difficulty, the posture informs you about your experience and gives you a way to examine it through experience.

You can sit on a cushion, bench, chair, lie down, or walk when doing Zazen. In all cases make an effort to keep your head balanced on your shoulders and your back straight and relaxed. You can hold your hands in your lap, or if you know the Zen hand mudra you can use that. Stay in the center, neither leaning forward or backwards or left or right. Keep your eyes half open and lightly focused downwards a foot or two in front of you.

Take a few breaths. Then observe your breath like you might watch ocean waves at the shore, coming in and going out. Center your attention in your belly by feeling your breathing, getting a sense of the movement of breath throughout your body. Don't control your breath or your mind.Your breathing will change naturally. When your body settles your mind often follows. Let thoughts and images come and go. Zazen is learning to observe what is happening without being distracted.

Enjoy being present with life as it is now, no matter what it is!

Zazen: Just Sitting

Zazen is just sitting. It is very plain and ultimately open. When I sit I can attend to whatever is present without meddling and without trying to achieve something special. Simple Zen sitting is becoming familiar with body, mind, feelings, and spirit. The upright and balanced posture of meditation is a reference point for spiritual inquiry and a complete expression of our universal nature. Making the effort to stop in stillness reveals the world as it is, which is waking up to reality, something we can lose in the midst of busy lives.

'How do I show up?' is a spiritual question sitting on my shoulder whenever I sit zazen. Am I all here, and what is the quality of my participation: bored, happy, lost, confused, clear, afraid, calm? Sitting is a chance to meet myself as I really am, not how I wish to be, think I am, or how I was. Zazen creates the wonderment of existing right now...what is it, how is it, where is it, am I awake to it?

Welcoming silence closes the gap between the so called 'outer' and 'inner' worlds. As Katigiri Roshi was fond of saying, there is 'no gap' between you and the world. Just sitting is a field of intimacy, direct experience, truth. It is also a fertile field for cultivating loving kindness, wisdom, alertness, giving, patience, and energy. How this happens....who knows?!

3 Marks of Existence

The three ground rules of Zen (and Buddhism) are the core facts of Reality. Traditionally called 'the three marks of existence', they are how things work in the moments, days, and flow of our lives and the lives of all sentient beings and existences. They are self evident and irrefutable. If you pick up the practice of clarifying them in your life and of healing your relationship with them, they can illuminate your confusion and difficulties. Alignment with them can bring clarity and peace.


Ground Rule #1: Everything Changes. This is stating the obvious. There is nothing in the universe that doesn't conform to this: atoms, rocks, trees, people, dogs and cats, suns and moons and stars. Things arise and come into existence, they hang out and durate for a time, and then they go bye-bye. They are like clouds forming from vapor and then dissipating. When you can see this completely, your attachment to the apparently 'solid' and fixed nature of things can subtly shift, and flowing with life can become easier. How we deal with change, transition, and evanescence is a cornerstone of self examination and insight.


Ground Rule # 2: Life is Suffering. This is stating the obvious but can be distasteful. If you are alive you will suffer. There is no way out of this. Much human folly is involved in either clinging to suffering or keeping it at bay. The Zen path acknowledges, invites, engages, welcomes, and befriends suffering. This movement toward suffering is done not only for oneself, but for the benefit of 'all beings', for everything that exists, which is the altruistic ground of Buddhist life. Birth, old age, disease, and death are the source of living. Welcoming suffering is the beginning of a path to Great Joy....May All Being Be Happy!


Ground Rule #3: There is no Self. This is stating the not so obvious and perplexing. The Zen path of awakening hopefully helps it become obvious, which paradoxically it always is. Nothing in reality exists alone or has something you can point to as a separate reality. So the matrix of life, the inter-being, the universal nature, Buddha nature, big mind, sky mind, soft mind, True Self.....which are the notions we use to point at something outside of thought and conceptual reality....this is the essence of you and life. In Zen we learn to treasure each person and thing as Buddha, as a point of unity and difference in the cosmic net of Reality. We also emphasize the ordinariness of life, the nothing special quality of reality. No glitter, no big deal, just eat what's on your plate.

Zen Paradox

Zen can be both refreshing and perplexing when teachings are of the 'not this not that' variety, which often threads it's way through Zen literature and dharma talks. The straight line from A to Z, our certainties about things and how they work, and our proclivity for self centeredness can't seem to find solid ground in the sea of the unlimited openness of universal nature.

What is 'not this not that'? It is the way of total inclusivity, of no separation between self and other. As a baseline for working with your life, it is a compass for examining when we identify with something, when we value some object over another, or when we get hung up on thinking we've 'got it down', whatever 'it' is. I know my conditioned tendency is to label objects, judge people on a variety of traits, and value or de-value some things about myself over others. Although this is a conditioned tendency for everyone I think, it also limits the openness and connection to life.

Zen can help balance the world of 'me' with our Universal Nature, and the complete acceptance of everything that occurs this moment. At a very practical level, when I am hung up mentally or emotionally or physically, I often ask myself 'am I being one-sided about things?', where in my uptightness can I find openness and acceptance? I may not find out, but even by asking I tend to soften, relax, and begin to flow with my activity.

4 Noble Truths

Commonly known as the 'four noble truths', these notions place the encounter with suffering at the center of Zen practice and Buddhist philosophy. Upright implies straight, true, solid, core, noble, magnificent, beneficent, and embodied. The four truths are more than abstractions, they are the prima materia of Zen practice and realization.The simplicity of the truths can camouflage the difficulty of accepting and working with them.

The first upright truth is that life is suffering. The hedonistic side of us wishes this were not so, the shameful and guilt ridden side goes 'definitely', and the morose or depressed side prefers to drown in it. We spend much of our inner time running from suffering, abhorring suffering, or staying asleep to its pervasive nature and impact. Few people pick it up to study, experience, and transform into loving kindness, tolerance, patience, and truth. The acceptance of suffering doesn't deify it but rather turns us into realists, pragmatist, and insightful heroes on the spiritual path of awakening.

The second upright truth is that there is an end to suffering. This is a bold paradox that requires deep faith. If life is suffering as the first upright truth suggest, then there can not be an end to it because it is ever present. Perhaps this is the first koan (paradoxical question of spiritual inquiry) of Buddhism and Zen; how does one put an end to suffering? There is no glib or wise answer that will suffice of course, because this is what each person must resolve through decades of spiritual inquiry and living. When we study our own life and loosen the tensions that bind us, our relationship to suffering seems to change.

The potential of change leads to the third upright truth: there is a path away from suffering. Please notice that the third truth doesn't say that the path away from suffering means that suffering stops. The oft quoted saying 'pain required, suffering optional' hints at the path and transformation. Something occurs when we embrace suffering whole heartedly, when we find the balance between our own suffering and the suffering of the world, when the gap of self-other is closed and we awaken Universal nature.

The final upright truth is that the path has eight steps. The eight steps are powerful ones and can be a compass for wise living. There are also infinite steps, for each moment-activity could be though of as a step toward resolving our relationship with suffering....if we are willing to do so and see it as such. So the Eightfold Noble or Upright Path are the cornerstones of Buddhist Practice and an effort to resolve suffering...for all beings everywhere through all space and time.

Hungry Ghosts

The fall solstice brings autumn leaves, gentle rains, and food-a-plenty. It is harvest time, a time for celebrating the bounty of the earth and for grateful acknowledgment of the work it took to bring it to our tables. It is also a time of Halloween and ghosts. The Zen Segaki ritual is a way of feeding the Hungry Ghosts.

I have always appreciated the image of hungry ghosts as a quick symbolic reminder of my deep unhappiness and the root causes of it, namely an insatiable appetite and the absence of gratitude. Of course I share this with all human beings, which doesn't provide too much comfort, and that is why it is central to Buddhist teachings. In our conditioned states we are greedy and nothing fills us up, our desires run away with us. Hungry ghosts are depicted as emaciated beings with distended bellies and throat's too narrow to let food pass through.

We want to be fed and we won't let sustenance in. This is a psychological double bind that drives us nuts. Sometimes we think if we just have more of what we want we will be happy. Sometimes we think that if we squeeze down on the desires we will be happy. Sometimes we think if we practice Zen long enough the problem of insatiable longings will go away. Delusion after delusion. So how do we meet the Hungry Ghosts in our lives and what do we do with them?

Love them for starters. This is learning to appreciate our shadow side and the things that trouble us. We can meditate and just watch them, which at times let's our throats open up and allows the love and interconnection within each moment fill us completely. We can work with them by sorting out the inner greed, longings, loneliness, needs, angers, and selfish experiences that are the anatomy of Hungry Ghosts. And of course........we can shout BOO!

Sutra of Loving Kindness

Kanji for Loving Kindness

I read the Metta Sutra of Loving Kindness every day. The altruistic aspirations help me touch the grace of good will toward the earth and all inhabitants....two leggeds, four leggeds, winged ones, fish, and creepy crawlers as the Native Americans would say. The Sutra speaks for itself.

This is what should be accomplished by the one who is wise, who seeks the good and has obtained peace:

Let one be strenuous, upright and sincere, without pride, easily contented and joyous.
Let one not be submerged by the things of the world.
Let one not take upon one’s self the burden of riches.
Let one’s senses be controlled.
Let one be wise but not puffed up; and let one not desire great possessions even for one’s family.
Let one do nothing that is mean or that the wise would reprove.

May all beings be happy. May they be joyous and live in safety.

All living beings, whether weak or strong, in high or middle or low realms of existence, small or great, visible or invisible, near or far, born or to be born, may all beings be happy.

Let no one deceive another, nor despise any being in any state; let none by anger or hatred wish harm to another.

Even as a mother at the risk of her life watches over and protects her only child, so with a boundless mind should one cherish all living things, suffusing love over the entire world, above, below and all around without limit; so let one cultivate an infinite good will toward the whole world.

Standing or walking, sitting or lying down, during all one’s waking hours let one cherish the thought that this way of living is the best in the world.

Abandoning vague discussions, having a clear vision, freed from sense appetites, one who has become complete will never again know rebirth in the cycle of creation of suffering for ourselves or others.