Guilt is a form of not accepting things as they are. It is adding something extra to circumstances while at the same time taking something away. What we aren't accepting is our own feelings, usually of discomfort with somebody's behavior. We deny (take away) our resentful feelings then project them onto the other person, then feel guilty about not meeting their expectations. Guilt is a movie and fast two-step we torment ourselves with.
Healing guilt can be as simple as accepting your true experiences of discomfort and resentment without judgment. In Zen we embrace and work with all of ourselves, the light and the dark sides of our nature. During Zen meditation you can embrace your real feelings and treasure all of yourself. When we stay in guilt we distance ourselves from the loving kindness we have towards another, we actual hang on to our ill will. Taking personal responsibility for guilt first requires insight and then forgiveness.
If you do something wrong, remorse is an appropriate feeling, much deeper and richer than guilt. Remorse is sorrow for your actions and a willingness to transform your behavior. Healthy remorse is a sign of growth rather than the depression and anxiety of guilt. Turning guilt into acceptance keeps your heart open and your mind free.
Guilt and Truth
